all I really want

Enough about me, let's talk about you for a minute
Enough about you, let's talk about life for a while

realism

I don't want to be the glue that holds your pieces together
I don't want to be your idol
See this pedestal is high and I'm afraid of heights

A trip to Japan and the meanings behind it

I write this from Japan, the land of lovely and caring people, who can also be submissive and hierarchy-obsessed. A land that mixes new and old, full of flashing lights and traditional buildings.

This trip means a lot to me for a couple of reasons, which I shall explain here.

For those who don't know, I am Brazilian born and bred. My father's family is of Japanese origin, hence my slight Asian looks. I have also been naturalised British after living in England for almost 7 years - so quite a mix.

On the 1st April 2014, my Japanese grandmother lost her battle against Parkinson's disease at age 91. She had a good life and, whilst the selfish part of me wishes she was still with us, my rational self knows she was physically and mentally suffering.

My grandma (or "batiyan" as we call it in Japanese) taught me many different lessons, from how to respect others to the importance of showing gratitude. She also tried her best to pass on the Japanese culture she'd had on to her children and grandchildren and I think she succeeded.

Coming to Japan, just over a year after my grandma's passing, has helped me explore more of this culture which I somewhat refused to absorb over the years. After touring around for a bit, I now understand much better why my grandma acted the way she did in certain situations. I can also say a lot of the trip has reminded me of happy times we had together, especially moments from my childhood - from senbei eating to origami making, which I was terrible at! A walk full of learning and joy down memory lane.

In addition to my family memories, visiting Japan marks a special milestone for my relationship with Jamie. We always spoke about how we wanted to visit Japan together, but it was always so expensive - after finally settling in our new place (not so new anymore!) and changing jobs, we finally managed to make the dream come true. We shall now figure out what's next (aside of Australia, which is already on the cards for next year).